Netflix Movie Review Reviews
It's pretty simple, this is Netflix Movie Review Reviews, a blog where I review reviews that are posted on Netflix of movies.
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I know this blog is called Netflix MOVIE review reviews, but I’m going to review tv show reviews too, so shut up. The Review: What. The. Fuck? This is the most mysterious shit I’ve ever seen. The person says nothing but overwhelmingly positive things… and then rates it a 2? I do not understand. Awesome tv show. I am addicted to it. It’s super. Cranston is marvelous. Very edgy. That’s a glowing fucking completely positive review, why does it have only one star above the lowest fucking rating you can give it? Is it fucking opposite day or something? Does this person hate things that are good? If you are this reviewer I demand you justify this score to me! I love Breaking Bad, it’s as addictive and pure as the blue meth that Heisenberg cooks. If anybody says anything bad about Breaking Bad I feel like blowing half of their face off so half of their head is a skeleton. The show is amazing. It’s a scientific fact. So part of me wants to be mad at this idiot for scoring the movie a two, but then… he’s agreeing with how I feel in his review. I am so conflicted. I don’t know man. Shit’s crazy yo. Yo, your review and your rating don’t make any sense together… BITCH! Here are two more reviews that I can’t screencap because the text will be to small, so I’ll copy and paste: 1) 3 stars To me, one thing is clearer than any pure, rarified meth crystals Walter White cooks up in his lab (and waxes poetic about to anyone who lends an ear). This is a man that holds a grudge and lives for pure, unadulterated pride - he clings to and cherishes these more than his family, friends, or any concern for fellow humans. Along the way, he is in complete denial about what is really driving his actions. Walt embodies a rage-fueled, opportunistic, unadulterated selfishness, as he vainly misappropriates & distorts the phrase “providing for family”. This show dares the viewer to empathize with him as he willfully jeopardizes the lives of his family, friends, business partners and others with staggering recklessness - all to feel better about his impending death and whatever “legacy” his resentful, bitter mind can manage to wring out of his last moments on earth. After being diagnosed with terminal lung cancer, he knows his family needs money and security, but it can’t be money from THOSE PEOPLE, heaven forbid - the millionaire scientist “friends” that offer him a safe, lucrative job as a chemist & practically beg him to let them pay all his medical expenses. Apparently, early on in his scientific career he was wronged by them (intellectually & romantically) and his injured pride cannot accept that kind of dirty money - dirty money he believes should have been his to begin with. If dirty money is going to be taken - it’s going to be taken HIS WAY. Walt’s ego eagerly finds a way to swallow blood money - money built on the tormented, hellish existence of addicts and miserable human cogs bound to drug cartel machinery. Depending on your personal preference, you can use this show to celebrate & mythologize Walt’s fantastical conversion from geeky, under-paid high school teacher & impotent car wash grunt to seething, rage hardened, drug-cooking power machine (and fall for the “family provider” BS), or you can root for him to get put out of business once & for all. 2) 3 stars The whole premise of this series is idiotic: chem. teacher with lung cancer (and a dependent family) totally lucks out and has the offer of a lifetime from his old business partner to make tons more $$ at a job he might love (instead of low-pay teaching), which he is too stupid to accept (infintile ego), then also turns down the offer for his entire treatment to be paid for by his ex-partner (even though the teacher helped start the company with his ideas) and lies to his family about the whole thing. So what does he do? Turns to making meth while coughing his lungs out and dodging his (just so happens) DEA brother in law. Stupid. Anyone so absurdly prideful idiotic deserves every bit of bad luck they reap. The marks to clunky writing are all over this thing. These two people both have the same complaint. Walter White is irrational and prideful, and cooking meth was an extremely poor decision when he could’ve just accepted money from his friends and family. *sigh* I will never understand these types of people who feel like they can’t enjoy a show or a character unless they agree with everything they do. What the fuck kind of boring tv do you watch where everybody always does the right thing? Yes, Walter White make extremely bad decisions because he is stubborn and egotistical, not because they are the best option, not because they are the most altruistic option, but because he’s motivated by pride and wants to do things on his own terms, and it just so happens he fucks up and gets in way over his head. THAT SHIT’S CALLED DRAMA MOTHERFUCKER! It’s fucking character driven, he’s in these shitty situations because of his CHOICES, not because it’s what circumstance dictated. Would you prefer the show where Walter does the wise thing and accepts the money, and he never even gets involved with Jesse Pinkman, and blah blah, happily ever after he lives a boring fucking life until he dies of cancer? THAT’S NOT A TV SHOW! Another thing, since reviewer number 2 wants to be nitpick. You say his brother in law “just so happens” to be a DEA agent, as if it’s way too coincidental that he’s cooking meth and has a DEA brother. But you’re forgetting simple fact dipshit, Walter GETS THE IDEA TO COOK METH BECAUSE OF HIS RELATIONSHIP TO HANK! That’s called cause and effect idiot, it’s not serendipity. You people suck at watching tv. I give all these reviews: No stars. I hate you.

I know this blog is called Netflix MOVIE review reviews, but I’m going to review tv show reviews too, so shut up.

The Review:

What. The. Fuck? This is the most mysterious shit I’ve ever seen. The person says nothing but overwhelmingly positive things… and then rates it a 2? I do not understand.

Awesome tv show.

I am addicted to it.

It’s super.

Cranston is marvelous.

Very edgy.

That’s a glowing fucking completely positive review, why does it have only one star above the lowest fucking rating you can give it? Is it fucking opposite day or something? Does this person hate things that are good? If you are this reviewer I demand you justify this score to me!

I love Breaking Bad, it’s as addictive and pure as the blue meth that Heisenberg cooks. If anybody says anything bad about Breaking Bad I feel like blowing half of their face off so half of their head is a skeleton. The show is amazing. It’s a scientific fact. So part of me wants to be mad at this idiot for scoring the movie a two, but then… he’s agreeing with how I feel in his review. I am so conflicted.

I don’t know man. Shit’s crazy yo. Yo, your review and your rating don’t make any sense together… BITCH!

Here are two more reviews that I can’t screencap because the text will be to small, so I’ll copy and paste:

1) 3 stars

To me, one thing is clearer than any pure, rarified meth crystals Walter White cooks up in his lab (and waxes poetic about to anyone who lends an ear). This is a man that holds a grudge and lives for pure, unadulterated pride - he clings to and cherishes these more than his family, friends, or any concern for fellow humans. Along the way, he is in complete denial about what is really driving his actions. Walt embodies a rage-fueled, opportunistic, unadulterated selfishness, as he vainly misappropriates & distorts the phrase “providing for family”. This show dares the viewer to empathize with him as he willfully jeopardizes the lives of his family, friends, business partners and others with staggering recklessness - all to feel better about his impending death and whatever “legacy” his resentful, bitter mind can manage to wring out of his last moments on earth. After being diagnosed with terminal lung cancer, he knows his family needs money and security, but it can’t be money from THOSE PEOPLE, heaven forbid - the millionaire scientist “friends” that offer him a safe, lucrative job as a chemist & practically beg him to let them pay all his medical expenses. Apparently, early on in his scientific career he was wronged by them (intellectually & romantically) and his injured pride cannot accept that kind of dirty money - dirty money he believes should have been his to begin with. If dirty money is going to be taken - it’s going to be taken HIS WAY. Walt’s ego eagerly finds a way to swallow blood money - money built on the tormented, hellish existence of addicts and miserable human cogs bound to drug cartel machinery. Depending on your personal preference, you can use this show to celebrate & mythologize Walt’s fantastical conversion from geeky, under-paid high school teacher & impotent car wash grunt to seething, rage hardened, drug-cooking power machine (and fall for the “family provider” BS), or you can root for him to get put out of business once & for all.

2) 3 stars

The whole premise of this series is idiotic: chem. teacher with lung cancer (and a dependent family) totally lucks out and has the offer of a lifetime from his old business partner to make tons more $$ at a job he might love (instead of low-pay teaching), which he is too stupid to accept (infintile ego), then also turns down the offer for his entire treatment to be paid for by his ex-partner (even though the teacher helped start the company with his ideas) and lies to his family about the whole thing. So what does he do? Turns to making meth while coughing his lungs out and dodging his (just so happens) DEA brother in law. Stupid. Anyone so absurdly prideful idiotic deserves every bit of bad luck they reap. The marks to clunky writing are all over this thing.

These two people both have the same complaint. Walter White is irrational and prideful, and cooking meth was an extremely poor decision when he could’ve just accepted money from his friends and family.

*sigh*

I will never understand these types of people who feel like they can’t enjoy a show or a character unless they agree with everything they do. What the fuck kind of boring tv do you watch where everybody always does the right thing? Yes, Walter White make extremely bad decisions because he is stubborn and egotistical, not because they are the best option, not because they are the most altruistic option, but because he’s motivated by pride and wants to do things on his own terms, and it just so happens he fucks up and gets in way over his head. THAT SHIT’S CALLED DRAMA MOTHERFUCKER! It’s fucking character driven, he’s in these shitty situations because of his CHOICES, not because it’s what circumstance dictated. Would you prefer the show where Walter does the wise thing and accepts the money, and he never even gets involved with Jesse Pinkman, and blah blah, happily ever after he lives a boring fucking life until he dies of cancer? THAT’S NOT A TV SHOW!

Another thing, since reviewer number 2 wants to be nitpick. You say his brother in law “just so happens” to be a DEA agent, as if it’s way too coincidental that he’s cooking meth and has a DEA brother. But you’re forgetting simple fact dipshit, Walter GETS THE IDEA TO COOK METH BECAUSE OF HIS RELATIONSHIP TO HANK! That’s called cause and effect idiot, it’s not serendipity.

You people suck at watching tv.

I give all these reviews: No stars. I hate you.

THE REVIEW: Oh God, listen to this stupid man or woman, why didn’t they just write “I’m too rich to enjoy or even understand why others enjoy movies about dumb poor losers, bleeehh!” I hope you imagined that in the most snooty voice possible, if you didn’t go back and read it again, make sure you turn your nose upward and make the most smug facial expression possible, and do your best impression of an insufferable fucking rich snob. Got it? Gross right? Don’t you just want to kick the person you’ve imagined in whatever configuration of genitalia they have? ME TOO! I won’t say this review is useless, because I’m sure it’s helpful to other millionaires who have a very specific resentment of burnout Southern California losers and can’t enjoy movies that feature them as a protagonist. But for everyone else (non-millionaires) who don’t give a shit about the achievements and social status of their lead movie characters, and only expect characters to be… ya know… interesting or likeable, this review is a pile of dog shit sitting on top of a pile of horseshit on top of another pile of bullshit. It’s a triple-decker pile of shit review. My favorite part is this buttface’s compulsion to let everyone know they’re a millionaire and talk about their personal lives. Their self-centeredness is just radiating off the computer screen. There’s absolutely no good reason to bring up that you’re a millionaire during a review of a movie. I can just imagine what it’s like being around this person who is probably constantly trying to relate everything to themselves and how they’re rich. non-millinaire: “Have you seen Breaking Bad? It’s so good right?!” millionaire: “Meh, I don’t care for it, and I can’t see why anybody would like a show about some loser teacher who wasted his potential and now has to resort to illegal activities to provide for his family. I worked hard to become the millionaire I am today so I can provide for my family and if I ever get cancer they’ll be taken care of.” non-millionaire: “Care to make a little wager on the Superbowl buddy?” millionaire: “No, of course not. I never gamble, I’ve made it a point all throughout my life to be very judicious when it comes to my funds. That’s one of the reasons I’m the millionaire I am today. Also football is for poor burnout loser people.” non-millionaire: “Hey how’s it go-“ millionaire: “I’M A MILLIONAIRE! Shut up you Southern California burnout loser!” That’s what I imagine this guy to be like. Also, let’s take a look at their criticism of the Dude-like people he’s encountered during college. “I knew burnouts like him in college who posed as stoner intellectuals that actually were just rich kid losers that wen’t really all that smart and I classified as phoneys.” First of all, run on fucking sentence you fucking rich illiterate asshole. Second of all, what the fuck is Richie Rich even trying to say about these people from his college? Let me try to work it out… in actuality they’re rich kid losers who are not exeptionally smart, but they’re phoney because they are posing as stoner intellectuals? What the fuck does that even mean? If these rich idiots like to sit around and smoke pot and pontificate how is that intrinsically disingenuous? Being a rich kid loser isn’t some kind of antithesis of stoner intellectualism, a person can be both. This dude is a really judgmental twat. EVEN IF these people were phoneys, what the fuck does that have to do with this movie? Why are you bitching about people you knew in college in a movie review? Not the time and place idiot. It’s called NetFLIX, as in movies, not NetBitchaboutallthephoneysthatwenttomycollegelikeanybodyfuckingcaresaboutthatshit. If you’ve noticed, I’ve started using male pronouns to describe this reviewer. This is not because I’m some kind of sexist who defaults anonymous people to male. No, I’m calling this person a he because I’ve figured out their identity, and I can’t believe I didn’t recognize it sooner. This millionaire with a strong bias against Southern California loser burnouts can only be one man. The writer of this review is none other than… THAT’S RIGHT! JEFFREY LE-fucking-BOWSKI HIMSELF! Jeffrey Lebowski hates people like his namesake who prefers to go by The Dude. He’s exactly the kind of person who would watch The Big Lebowski and hate it because it’s about some laid back jobless slacker. Really pathetic Mr. Lebowski, it’s just super petty that you felt the need to make some anonymous review on Netflix because you wanted to disparage this film. You’re just jealous because everyone recognizes The Dude as the better Lebowski of the two of you. You may be a millionaire, but everybody hates you, you curmudgeonly old gross wheelchair warmer. In conclusion, your review sucks, because it’s not much of a review and rather just you asserting that you hate “burnouts”. You may think a movie about a burnout is a waste of time, but… yeah, well, you know, that’s just, like, your opinion, man. I give your review: -4 stars

THE REVIEW:

Oh God, listen to this stupid man or woman, why didn’t they just write “I’m too rich to enjoy or even understand why others enjoy movies about dumb poor losers, bleeehh!” I hope you imagined that in the most snooty voice possible, if you didn’t go back and read it again, make sure you turn your nose upward and make the most smug facial expression possible, and do your best impression of an insufferable fucking rich snob. Got it? Gross right? Don’t you just want to kick the person you’ve imagined in whatever configuration of genitalia they have? ME TOO!

I won’t say this review is useless, because I’m sure it’s helpful to other millionaires who have a very specific resentment of burnout Southern California losers and can’t enjoy movies that feature them as a protagonist. But for everyone else (non-millionaires) who don’t give a shit about the achievements and social status of their lead movie characters, and only expect characters to be… ya know… interesting or likeable, this review is a pile of dog shit sitting on top of a pile of horseshit on top of another pile of bullshit. It’s a triple-decker pile of shit review.

My favorite part is this buttface’s compulsion to let everyone know they’re a millionaire and talk about their personal lives. Their self-centeredness is just radiating off the computer screen. There’s absolutely no good reason to bring up that you’re a millionaire during a review of a movie. I can just imagine what it’s like being around this person who is probably constantly trying to relate everything to themselves and how they’re rich.

non-millinaire: “Have you seen Breaking Bad? It’s so good right?!”

millionaire: “Meh, I don’t care for it, and I can’t see why anybody would like a show about some loser teacher who wasted his potential and now has to resort to illegal activities to provide for his family. I worked hard to become the millionaire I am today so I can provide for my family and if I ever get cancer they’ll be taken care of.”

non-millionaire: “Care to make a little wager on the Superbowl buddy?”

millionaire: “No, of course not. I never gamble, I’ve made it a point all throughout my life to be very judicious when it comes to my funds. That’s one of the reasons I’m the millionaire I am today. Also football is for poor burnout loser people.”

non-millionaire: “Hey how’s it go-“

millionaire: “I’M A MILLIONAIRE! Shut up you Southern California burnout loser!”

That’s what I imagine this guy to be like. Also, let’s take a look at their criticism of the Dude-like people he’s encountered during college. “I knew burnouts like him in college who posed as stoner intellectuals that actually were just rich kid losers that wen’t really all that smart and I classified as phoneys.” First of all, run on fucking sentence you fucking rich illiterate asshole. Second of all, what the fuck is Richie Rich even trying to say about these people from his college? Let me try to work it out… in actuality they’re rich kid losers who are not exeptionally smart, but they’re phoney because they are posing as stoner intellectuals? What the fuck does that even mean? If these rich idiots like to sit around and smoke pot and pontificate how is that intrinsically disingenuous? Being a rich kid loser isn’t some kind of antithesis of stoner intellectualism, a person can be both. This dude is a really judgmental twat. EVEN IF these people were phoneys, what the fuck does that have to do with this movie? Why are you bitching about people you knew in college in a movie review? Not the time and place idiot. It’s called NetFLIX, as in movies, not NetBitchaboutallthephoneysthatwenttomycollegelikeanybodyfuckingcaresaboutthatshit.

If you’ve noticed, I’ve started using male pronouns to describe this reviewer. This is not because I’m some kind of sexist who defaults anonymous people to male. No, I’m calling this person a he because I’ve figured out their identity, and I can’t believe I didn’t recognize it sooner. This millionaire with a strong bias against Southern California loser burnouts can only be one man. The writer of this review is none other than…

THAT’S RIGHT! JEFFREY LE-fucking-BOWSKI HIMSELF! Jeffrey Lebowski hates people like his namesake who prefers to go by The Dude. He’s exactly the kind of person who would watch The Big Lebowski and hate it because it’s about some laid back jobless slacker. Really pathetic Mr. Lebowski, it’s just super petty that you felt the need to make some anonymous review on Netflix because you wanted to disparage this film. You’re just jealous because everyone recognizes The Dude as the better Lebowski of the two of you. You may be a millionaire, but everybody hates you, you curmudgeonly old gross wheelchair warmer.

In conclusion, your review sucks, because it’s not much of a review and rather just you asserting that you hate “burnouts”. You may think a movie about a burnout is a waste of time, but… yeah, well, you know, that’s just, like, your opinion, man.

I give your review: -4 stars

THE REVIEW: The fuck is this? Is this supposed to be a movie review? Ugh, Terry Terry Terry (that’s the name I’m making up for this person since Netflix reviews are anonymous). Listen Terry (I’m also going to pretend like this person serendipitously found this blog and is reading my words) I’m glad that by some grand coincidence you found this blog, because I need to tell you that you are the dumbest person. You are so dumb. God, look at your dumb face (I can’t see it but I just know it’s the worst). You’re dumb and stupid and I hate you and so does everyone else. Terry, this is a prime example of a terrible Netflix review. This is like the holocaust, slavery, pearl harbor and 9/11 all rolled into one, in Netflix movie review form. It’s an atrocity, of the worst degree. I’m going to break down why this Netflix review is the worst and you are dumb, Terry. It comes down to two things. The first thing is that the purpose of posting a review is to help your fellow Netflixers get a sense of what to expect from this movie. It’s your job as a Netflix review poster to provide some information that’s going to help the Netflix review reader evaluate whether the movie is worth watching or to what extent they can expect to enjoy it. The way you do this is to list some of the films strengths and/or flaws. For instance you can criticize the acting or plot, perhaps the cinematography, maybe in this case the fight choreography since this is a martial arts movie. Those are the types of things that are helpful, things someone can read and say to themselves “Well I don’t care that much about plot or acting as long as it has some really good fight scenes”. That’s how it’s supposed to work. Your review needs to help them make an informed decision. But you Terry, you took the time to give this movie the lowest score possible… and then give NO FUCKING GOOD REASON WHY! All we get from this review is that you don’t like Bruce Lee noises. That’s your review? Your only criticism of the movie is that the main character makes Bruce Lee noises? Oh no! Not like Bruce Lee! This movie must clearly be unwatchable if the main character makes noises like the most beloved fucking martial arts movie star of all fucking time! You are human garbage Terry. That was just thing number one. Remember I said two things? The second thing Terry, is that you didn’t even finish the goddam movie! How DARE you review a movie you haven’t seen in it’s entirety? Let me tell you something, and this is something I believe in my heart of hearts. Every movie, no matter how shitty it may or may not be, at the very least deserves to be viewed in full before having a review written of it. All movies deserve that courtesy, it’s only fair. Hey, if you want to tell your friends it sucks, fine, but don’t get on a website to spitefully try to bring down a movie you haven’t even fully watched. That’s just rude, and stupid. You stupid rude person. Do you listen to the first few seconds of a song and write a whole album review? Huh? Do you? Do you get to first base with a girl and tell are your friends she’s a bad lay? NO! Because you have to go all the way to know what the fuck you’re talking about. Also don’t go around badmouthing girls behind their backs to your guy friends you douchebag. I hate you Terry. Third thing, SURPRISE! I lied about there only being two things, and I feel no guilt about this lie because I don’t consider you a human being. The third thing Terry, is that you weren’t content to just write your stupid little non-review of a movie you didn’t even watch, but you felt compelled to also INSULT all the people who DID watch the whole thing and gave it favorable reviews. What an absolute ass you are. Clearly you’re in the minority opinion regarding this movie, but you’re such arrogant asshole you’re going to tell everybody who enjoyed this movie (that you didn’t even finish for reasons still unknown) that they’re all WRONG for liking it. Ooh I wanna punch you. Has it ever occurred to you that these people who have watched the whole thing maybe have a more informed opinion of the movie than you do, you jackass? Of course it didn’t, instead of thoughts you just have fecal matter, shit-for-brains. “My name is Terry, if you liked this movie you smoked drugs! Why? Cause I don’t know, that’s why! I didn’t even watch the whole movie!” In conclusion Terry, you’re the worst dumbest person, you’re like a thousand Hitlers, I hope you burn in a special hell worse than the regular hell, a hell bellow hell that’s reserved especially for the lowest scum of the earth to ever exist, and you’ll be the first person in that special hell’s hell because NOBODY has EVER been as terrible as you are. I’m not telling you you’re wrong about this movie (but for the record you’re wrong about this movie), I don’t care about your wrongess. What I’m telling you is that the next time you want to write a movie review, watch the whole thing, and think of something to fucking say about it you fat fucking ugly fucking idiot dickhole. I’m just kidding Terry, never write another movie review ever again. I give your review: -5 stars

THE REVIEW:

The fuck is this? Is this supposed to be a movie review? Ugh, Terry Terry Terry (that’s the name I’m making up for this person since Netflix reviews are anonymous). Listen Terry (I’m also going to pretend like this person serendipitously found this blog and is reading my words) I’m glad that by some grand coincidence you found this blog, because I need to tell you that you are the dumbest person. You are so dumb. God, look at your dumb face (I can’t see it but I just know it’s the worst). You’re dumb and stupid and I hate you and so does everyone else. Terry, this is a prime example of a terrible Netflix review. This is like the holocaust, slavery, pearl harbor and 9/11 all rolled into one, in Netflix movie review form. It’s an atrocity, of the worst degree.

I’m going to break down why this Netflix review is the worst and you are dumb, Terry. It comes down to two things. The first thing is that the purpose of posting a review is to help your fellow Netflixers get a sense of what to expect from this movie. It’s your job as a Netflix review poster to provide some information that’s going to help the Netflix review reader evaluate whether the movie is worth watching or to what extent they can expect to enjoy it. The way you do this is to list some of the films strengths and/or flaws. For instance you can criticize the acting or plot, perhaps the cinematography, maybe in this case the fight choreography since this is a martial arts movie. Those are the types of things that are helpful, things someone can read and say to themselves “Well I don’t care that much about plot or acting as long as it has some really good fight scenes”. That’s how it’s supposed to work. Your review needs to help them make an informed decision. But you Terry, you took the time to give this movie the lowest score possible… and then give NO FUCKING GOOD REASON WHY! All we get from this review is that you don’t like Bruce Lee noises. That’s your review? Your only criticism of the movie is that the main character makes Bruce Lee noises? Oh no! Not like Bruce Lee! This movie must clearly be unwatchable if the main character makes noises like the most beloved fucking martial arts movie star of all fucking time! You are human garbage Terry.

That was just thing number one. Remember I said two things? The second thing Terry, is that you didn’t even finish the goddam movie! How DARE you review a movie you haven’t seen in it’s entirety? Let me tell you something, and this is something I believe in my heart of hearts. Every movie, no matter how shitty it may or may not be, at the very least deserves to be viewed in full before having a review written of it. All movies deserve that courtesy, it’s only fair. Hey, if you want to tell your friends it sucks, fine, but don’t get on a website to spitefully try to bring down a movie you haven’t even fully watched. That’s just rude, and stupid. You stupid rude person. Do you listen to the first few seconds of a song and write a whole album review? Huh? Do you? Do you get to first base with a girl and tell are your friends she’s a bad lay? NO! Because you have to go all the way to know what the fuck you’re talking about. Also don’t go around badmouthing girls behind their backs to your guy friends you douchebag. I hate you Terry.

Third thing, SURPRISE! I lied about there only being two things, and I feel no guilt about this lie because I don’t consider you a human being. The third thing Terry, is that you weren’t content to just write your stupid little non-review of a movie you didn’t even watch, but you felt compelled to also INSULT all the people who DID watch the whole thing and gave it favorable reviews. What an absolute ass you are. Clearly you’re in the minority opinion regarding this movie, but you’re such arrogant asshole you’re going to tell everybody who enjoyed this movie (that you didn’t even finish for reasons still unknown) that they’re all WRONG for liking it. Ooh I wanna punch you. Has it ever occurred to you that these people who have watched the whole thing maybe have a more informed opinion of the movie than you do, you jackass? Of course it didn’t, instead of thoughts you just have fecal matter, shit-for-brains. “My name is Terry, if you liked this movie you smoked drugs! Why? Cause I don’t know, that’s why! I didn’t even watch the whole movie!”

In conclusion Terry, you’re the worst dumbest person, you’re like a thousand Hitlers, I hope you burn in a special hell worse than the regular hell, a hell bellow hell that’s reserved especially for the lowest scum of the earth to ever exist, and you’ll be the first person in that special hell’s hell because NOBODY has EVER been as terrible as you are. I’m not telling you you’re wrong about this movie (but for the record you’re wrong about this movie), I don’t care about your wrongess. What I’m telling you is that the next time you want to write a movie review, watch the whole thing, and think of something to fucking say about it you fat fucking ugly fucking idiot dickhole. I’m just kidding Terry, never write another movie review ever again.

I give your review: -5 stars